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Participating in a mediation

What happens in a Tennessee Rule 31 mediation, how it compares with other options, and answers to common questions.

What to expect

What a Rule 31 Listed Mediator is

Rule 31 is the Tennessee Supreme Court rule that governs court-connected alternative dispute resolution. A Rule 31 Listed Mediator has completed state-approved training and appears on the list maintained by the Administrative Office of the Courts. Mediators are listed as general civil, family, or both. Family mediators handling matters involving domestic abuse must hold additional specialty training.

The mediator is a neutral. They do not represent either party, do not decide anything, and do not give legal advice.

Court-ordered vs. voluntary mediation

A court may order the parties to attend mediation. Even then, no one can be ordered to settle. Attendance can be required; agreement is always voluntary. Parties may also choose mediation privately, before or without a lawsuit.

What happens in a session

  • Opening. The mediator explains the process, their neutrality, confidentiality and its limits, that they do not give legal advice, and the ground rules.
  • Joint discussion. Each side describes the matter and what is important to them. The mediator builds a list of issues to work through.
  • Caucus. The mediator may meet privately with each side. What you say in caucus is not shared unless you give permission.
  • Agreement. Terms the parties reach are written down. In family matters this may include a parenting plan and a child support worksheet.

Confidentiality and its limits

Most mediation communications are confidential under Tennessee law and Rule 31. Under Rule 31 §5(a) the report states only which parties appeared and participated, whether the case settled completely, partially or not, and whether the mediator requests that fees be charged as court costs. Confidentiality is not absolute — threats of harm, mandatory child and vulnerable adult abuse reporting, and proceedings to enforce or set aside an agreement are common exceptions.

Cost and who pays

Mediators set their own rates, usually hourly or by the session, and fees are commonly split between the parties unless a court order or agreement says otherwise. Ask for the fee agreement in writing before the first session.

What the mediator does and does not do

  • Does: manage the process, test options, draft the terms the parties agree to.
  • Does not: give legal advice, predict how a judge would rule, represent either party, or report what was said to the court.

Domestic violence safeguards

Tell the mediator before scheduling if there has been domestic violence, an order of protection, or a court finding of abuse. Tennessee places specific limits on mediation in those circumstances, sessions can be held separately so the parties never share a room, arrival and departure can be staggered, and an advocate or support person may be available. You may have the right to decline mediation.

Finding a listed mediator

The Administrative Office of the Courts publishes a searchable list of Rule 31 Listed Mediators by county and listing type at tncourts.gov.

Your options

Three ways a dispute can end. They differ most in who decides, what it costs, and what becomes public.

Who decides
The parties
Typical cost
Lowest
Timeline
Weeks
Confidentiality
Confidential
Appeal
Not applicable
Enforceability
Enforceable once entered
Relationship impact
Preserving
Control over outcome
High
Formality
Informal
Precedent value
None

Direct benefits of mediation

  • Usually lower cost than a contested trial.
  • Faster resolution — weeks rather than a court calendar.
  • Party control and creative terms: a mediated agreement can include things no court could order.
  • Confidentiality, so the dispute does not become a public record.
  • Higher voluntary compliance, because the parties authored the agreement.

Indirect benefits

  • Better co-parenting communication.
  • Reduced emotional cost to the parties and, in family matters, to children.
  • Reduced court backlog and public expense.
  • Preserved business and community relationships.

When mediation is not the right fit

  • An unmitigated domestic-violence power imbalance or a safety risk.
  • A need for binding precedent or a public ruling.
  • A party who lacks capacity, or authority to settle.
  • A need for emergency relief.

How mediation works with your attorney

Attorneys may attend mediation, and many do. Any agreement should be reviewed by independent counsel before it is signed. Mediation complements legal advice; it does not replace it.

Arbitration in brief

Arbitration is private and binding, with a very limited right of appeal. It is usually chosen because a contract requires it, or because the parties want a decision without a public trial. Unlike mediation, the arbitrator decides.

Questions

Have a question about your own case? Ask your mediator or your attorney. Questions about this site.